Are we having fun yet?

I think my last post got more comments than any other post I've written. I guess we have a lot to say about food blogs. And the consensus seems to be this: While others' habits and definitions of "healthy" may be annoying or triggering, it really does not matter what someone else is eating (with a sub-consensus of: Spinach in a smoothie is disgusting). Whether or not someone's decision to eat 1/3 cup of oatmeal is restrictive is not my business. Whether or not someone's torrid love affair with antioxidants is really orthorexia is not my business (though I have the right to use the adjective "torrid"). I have a hard time trusting myself and separating myself from this idea of "an absolute right way." But, really, there is no right way that applies to everyone; there is only a right way that applies to me (or you).

So, yes, it doesn't matter what someone else is eating. Additionally, it doesn't matter what someone else is DOING.

Is it just me, or do bloggers seem to have the most exciting lives ever? Maybe it's just that people with exciting lives tend to blog. Whatever it is, in reading some blogs, I start to feel like the most boring human on Earth. Why is someone always going on a road trip? Or eating shellfish at 4-star restaurants? There seem to be all these courageous job-quitters, book-deal-getters, mountain-climbers, trip-goers, marathon/triathaloners, all-out explorers, kiss-and-tellers, social-gathering-havers. Is everyone entertaining people with wine and Jenga in their living rooms on a nightly basis? Am I missing something?

Of course, as I've said in many past posts, I am always wondering if the way I live is "right." Am I doing enough? Am I on my way to being a weird cat lady? Why is there no objective scale for this? People say that what matters is if I'm happy. To this I say, exasperated, Hello, how can I be happy when I'm constantly wondering if the way I'm living is making me happy?

(Do you see my neurosis? Is it clear? Is it any wonder that I like Woody Allen movies and that I'm seeing a psychiatrist on Monday? Okay then.)

The truth is that I find happiness in very small, mundane things. When I was first diagnosed with anorexia, I was told that I would "always see things small," and I think this is true. Just like I get depressed over minor details, I get happy over minor details. If I were to take pictures of my daily life excitements, blogger style, here are some things you would see:

• An empty laundry basket
• A book cover
• My iPod
• The list of saved shows in my DVR
• A couple red Netflix envelopes
• Cats, in various states of repose
• My favorite knit blanket that my mom's friend's mom gave us for our wedding
• My husband's side profile, with his curly hair at the bottom (he's growing it out in an attempt to look like Jesus or Charles Manson; I'm still not sure which)

Boring? Maybe. While I admire the adventurous spirit of many blogs I read/skim, I just don't live that way. Larry and I are very excited at home. Would you like me to post screenshots of the computer game we play? Our characters are frogs. Mine is named "Amphi."

Maybe "seeing things small" is not all bad. For example, today, my entire day was made by a little gesture from one of my bosses. As I said in my last post, he gave me this little yellow envelope with what appeared to be a hairy acorn inside. He told me to put it in hot water and see something beautiful. I feel like people hear directions like this at events like Burning Man. Anyway, I followed his instructions, and this


(hairy acorn, right? Apologies for bluriness. Photography is not one of my daily life excitements)

became this


It's a flower, in a wine glass. Yes, we have wine glasses at work. Several, in fact.

And now I'm home for calzones and NBC TV. That's a perfect day to me.

What are your daily excitements? Do you see things small, or big?
***
Today's gratitude:

1. Tomorrow is Friday! We're going to my sister's house on Saturday and I'm half-way looking forward to it, which is good, as I haven't been looking forward to many non-homebody activities lately. We may be having dinner with our boss and his wife on Sunday too. I can't decide if I'm anxious about this or not; depends when you ask me. Right now? No. Earlier today? Yes.

2. "Important Things with Demetri Martin" and "The Sarah Silverman Program" are back on Comedy Central! Tonight at 10pm :)

3. I have a potential side job that sounds fun. Something to do with editing baby product manuals.

4. After a weeks-long debate, I re-subscribed to Yoga Journal and Poets & Writers. I have such a hard time buying things fr myself, it's ridiculous.

5. Did I mention it's Friday?